Time really flies fast. It seems like yesterday, it is still 2011 – I am still in college and my Papa Jing is still alive and kicking.
But, I know that I am not dreaming.
It’s been four years since he died. And yet the memories are still fresh. I can still remember it. It wasn't surreal at all. I still wish that his death is just a dream. I still pray to God that I can accept everything as easy as counting 1, 2 and 3.
A lot of people are asking me how he died. But first, let me narrate what happened.
Last July 25, 2011 I am prepping up myself to go to school. I was excited because I was about to take my pre-final exams at Discrete Mathematics. My Papa Jing is still sleeping. And when me and my Mama Malou was shocked because I was about to go and he suddenly jumped out of where he was lying down and he said “Papasok ka na ba Jorie? Antayin mo ako. Ihahatid kita.” I told him “Wag na Pa. Malalate na po ako.” Then he quickly said “Mabilis lang.” So I waited patiently. Then he wore his not-so favorite shirt. We rode his motorcycle/scooter. And I was shocked ‘coz he is bring me to a total opposite direction and then I asked him “Bakit?” He just kept on driving until we reached a small house. That house is actually where our malfunctioning tamarraw is being fixed. He approached the caretaker of the repair shop and introduced me to him. I gave my warm smiles. Then we already went to my school. As I bid him goodbye, I just told him “Ingat ka Pa. I love you.” Then I kissed him and he left. I was at peace because he smiled at me. I watched him driving towards North. I don’t really know where he’s going. But still, I am at peace. The next thing I know was that, after 4pm the classes were suspended because that was President Noynoy Aquino’s State of the Nation Address (SONA) so I went home and gave a good news that I was one of those chosen people to compete for our Robotics contest at school (the competition happened last July 27, 2011). The evening came and my Papa Jing is not yet home. At around 11 o’ clock in the evening there was a blackout so all of us were able to sleep except my Mama Malou because she is now worried – worried because Papa Jing is not yet home. Then the next day, July 26, 2011, I got this “naalingpungatan” feeling. So I just decided to stand up and check what’s happening. My Mama Malou just hugged me and said… “Wala na si Papa mo.” – my first reaction was “Weh! Di nga? Ma, wag ka magbiro.” But when I saw Marijoy crying, I was just quiet. Then I saw the headline on the television “UNIDENTIFIED MAN” and the video just shows his body lying at the grasses and no breath at all. We all knew that it was my Papa Jing.Papa Jing died of two gunshots – one on his liver and the second was near his right ear. Despite of how it happened, one thing is certain, I praise God since that day because I really believe that my Papa Jing has found true peace in the arms of our loving Father – the Lord Jesus Christ.
God never failed to be faithful in His promises. (Now, that's the turning point or the climax of the story!) After my Papa Jing’s loss I became a stronger individual. I became more independent and I just learned to stand on my own. I also learned how it is to turn my mourning into dancing and my sorrow into joy as what the Bible says in Jeremiah 31:13. I learned new things. I met new people. I was able to meet those people who are credible enough and those aren't credible at all. My family and I were put into life’s different testings and yet I praise God personally because we are being blessed by the Greatest Blesser of all the time. We were blessed on our chosen paths. And we praise God because His promises became more evident in each and every one of us.
Lamentations 3:22-25 "The steadfast love of the LORD never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. 'The LORD is my portion,' says my soul, 'therefore I will hope in him.' The LORD is good to those who wait for him, to the soul who seeks him."
This Bible verse has been evident to my family’s life. There came a point that people just talk about us because of the blessings that we have. Some just hates us because we are blessed but those blessings are fruits of God’s promises. We cannot have those promises if we will not be enduring our life’s sufferings. No one lives a suffering-proof life. It is impossible. Everyone needs to go through a lot of things so that our faith in the Lord will become stronger.
“If battles do not exists, then victories won’t exists either.” – Yours Truly
This is one of the things I learned as I walk this journey called life. The reason why I can say I am a victor is not because of my own battles but rather because of the One true source of victories and blessings – Jesus Christ. If He did not fought for you and me and if He did not bought you and me for a price then I personally do not know where we will be right now. Maybe everything that is in this world is just a mere accident.
But why? Without God, who will teach us how to live our lives? Without God, who will grant us favor and promotions in the right place and in the right time? And without God, who will create those things that we see right now? Let us remember that everything that we see and do is not of men but by God alone. He just gave those scientists and inventors the wisdom to create those innovations and advancements for us. God cannot give all the gifts to a single person. He created limitations for us to be able to know how to fully depend on God and His timetable.
Psalm 90:12 "Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom."
Like branches on a tree,
we all grow in different directions,
yet our roots remain as one.
